Dear Other Parents:

Do you ever look at your children when they’re doing something insane– trying to balance a bouncy ball on his head in the middle of Target, or attempting to pull on some tights over a pair of Crocs, or sleeping peacefully in her pink satin sleep mask as though she is Zsa Zsa Gabor– and […]


    Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.

    So, the J has taken to hiding things in various places throughout the house: toys, Taggie blankets, my earrings, whatever.  We generally find these items a couple of days AFTER we needed them, for example Cammy’s soccer cleats which she had carefully placed inside her stuffed dog carrier “to keep them pretty.”

    I just […]


      Sigh.

      On Saturday morning at Cammy’s soccer game, Addie J abruptly announced that she had to pee.  We were, like, 1/4 mile from the nearest porta-john and I’m being entirely literal, AND porta-johns + small children = Julie’s greatest nightmare anyway.  So, in desperation, I put Addie in the back of the van and let […]


        What’s for lunch?

        If your name is Addie J and you  have been given a turkey sandwich, the answer is that you will stare at your sandwich and mutter, “These are bouncy balls.  I don’t eat bouncy balls,” for a few minutes.  Then, you’ll take out the turkey and cheese,  add some strawberry jelly to your bread and mustard, and happily eat […]


          More Evil

          Dave spent most of Tuesday evening scrupulously scrubbing out Billy Bubble’s fish tank.  Gabby even gave me a handwritten invitation to come to her room and bask in the glory.

          And yesterday,  just as I was ready to take the kabobs off the grill, Addie J dumped a new container of fish food into […]


            The Evil

            And here we have a photo of Addie J at preschool, petting a bunny.  (Seems like there’s no way for this scenario to go south, right?)  You’ll notice that both she and the bunny had a case of red-eye, from the camera flash… or so I thought.  I was corrected by Addie J:

            ADDIE: […]


              A List…

              …of things Addie J has cut with scissors in the last few days:

              1. Cameron’s soccer net in the back yard

              2. The lace bottoms of her black leggings

              3. The blinds on her bedroom window (Dave.  Was.  Livid.)

              4. Any and every piece of paper in the house, including things like bills and my […]


                Thanks for the Physical Coordination, Mom.

                So I went bowling last week with Cam and his class (side note: I bowled a strike on my first frame.  I texted a friend: “Hey!  I just bowled a strike!” and the response was, “The bumpers are up, I suppose?”).  On my way out– walking with a couple of moms I didn’t know […]


                  Happy Mother’s Day!

                  Please notice how I'm ignoring the way Addie J is trying to escape.

                  Dave and I had been out the night before Mother’s Day (disastrous.  Don’t even ask about it), so I was really appreciative of Dave not letting the kids wake me up at 6am for my “delicious breakfast.”   Gabby’s card read, “Happy […]


                    Addie the Style Critic

                    So I got my hair cut today, mostly in response to something having pissed me off earlier in the day.  (Interestingly, when I vented to a friend and then mentioned that I was off to get a haircut, the response was, “…….Are you sure you want to do that right now??”  Obviously my propensity […]