The Vortex

We took the kids miniature golfing this evening– or more accurately, we took the kids “Whack a Golf Ball Repeatedly Into the Stream and Take Turns Realizing You Need to Poop”-ing this evening. On the way home, Gabby asked me if there was such a thing as mini golf when I was a kid. […]

    My new resolution….

    ….is to never again run a 5K in 90-degree heat and 600% humidity.

    Even if there IS a beer tent afterwards.

    Actually, ESPECIALLY if there is a beer tent afterwards.

    And on a possibly related note: if anyone at the beer tent found $80 in cash on the ground, that was mine. I […]


      Gabby came running into the house the other day. I was on the phone, so she waited, visibly vibrating with excitement. When I got off she said, “MOM!!! MOM!!! Can I have some ice cream from the ice cream truck?!?!!?!”

      “Not today,” I said, mentally cursing the ice cream truck and the lure of […]

        Who did this???

        We all know that Addie J is prone to dressing herself up in random outfits. But she’s added the extra-special step of walking up to me, striking a pose, cocking her head, and crooning, “Stylish!!!!!”

        I’ve asked her several times who taught this to her, and she’s being pretty cagey. I also asked […]


          Oh my God, I’m in a rage all over again from just rereading one of these archived posts about trying to get a cup of coffee. I’ve added some new archives here, and fair warning: there’s an involved discussion of breast pumps contained therein.

          In other news: I have this giant ENORMOUS bug […]

            Wait a minute…

            So one of the features of this platform is that I get to see all the searches that led people to this site. It’s displayed on the home page and normally lists phrases like “family jules” or “family jewels” or, strangely often, “Richard Simmons.” Today, however, someone found my site after searching the phrase, […]

              Knock Knock….

              The following is an original joke by Addie J. She told it to my mom, who promptly told me, and I was dying laughing.

              ADDIE: Grandma, knock knock. MOM: Who’s there? ADDIE: Knock knock. MOM: Who’s there? ADDIE: Knock knock. MOM: …..Who’s there? ADDIE: Knock knock. MOM: Who’s there? ADDIE: Knock knock.

              [repeat many […]

                How to Suck Up: Apparently, There's a Learning Curve

                So I made some soup and paninis yesterday for dinner. The kids like paninis AND I’ve made this soup before to great acclaim, so I figured they’d all be thrilled and I’d rake in the accolades. Here’s how they each avoided eating their dinner, and if you factor in their respective ages, you can […]

                  Happy Birthday, Addie J, Redux

                  The week of Addie J’s actual birthday, as it turned out, was extremely stressful, busy, and filled with unexpected, major events (I’ve adopted the terminology of a friend who calls that “vital.” That week was very, very vital). My extended family and I took her out to dinner on her actual birthday and gave […]

                    More Archives

                    I’ve added a few more archives, including a party and the time Cameron did my hair. Speaking of parties: I’ve rented a Dora the Explorer jumpy for Sunday so I am officially the coolest mom on the freaking PLANET.


                      Page 1 of 212