Tuesday Bullets

Gabby’s trial went just as planned and she won her case for the Honeybees. Also, the student who was playing the judge had the “bailiff” escort an unruly participant out into the hall. This cracks me up sincerely. Did I mention that we met up with family last weekend at the cabin by […]


    I Totally Get It.

    Gabby headed to court this morning, lead attorney for Honeybees in their case against The Human Race. I had already procured her special index cards– ruled in light blue on one side only– and her Post-It flags for her pages of legal notes. This morning she dressed in dark gray leggings, a white button-down, and […]


      Pop Quiz:

      Which of these options is the worst?

      A. Painting your daughter’s room over spring break.

      B. Allowing her to choose the color, knowing that she wants it to look like a forest in there– so she chooses “Happy Meadow.” A color you privately refer to as “Sinus Infection.”

      C. Knowing that, when it’s finished, you and your […]


        Fish Are Good at Card Games

        We have friends who established a lovely tradition of sending St. Patrick’s Day gifts to the kids. This year, among the treasures, was a card game called Sleeping Queens* which the kids and I have been playing pretty much nonstop. I was in Gabby’s room yesterday, when Addie J went into her room and closed […]


          Nope.

          As we approached the school dropoff point this morning, Addie J piped up from the back seat: “Mom, what is puberty?”

          I said, “…….. You gotta give me a lot more time for that one, kiddo. Have a great day at school.”


            Presented Without Comment: Gabby’s Persuasive Letter Assignment

            She got an A and a, “Good luck!” from her teacher.

             


              Well, It Would Have to be a Really Delicious Muffin.

              There are no circumstances under which I would accept a muffin as a bribe.

               

              This is something I had to say, out loud, to my daughter– who, as far as I can tell, was testing my integrity as an educator.


                Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

                Empty. Something’s wrong, here.

                Today, I have an Irish dancer and a little leprechaun, and a teenager who said, “Mom, you’re not gonna get a picture out of me this morning.” I’ll give a midterm, and head to (yet another) Irish pub, and have (yet another) Guinness while I watch my dancer entertain […]


                  Conversations With Gabby

                  GABBY: Oh, hey Mom:

                  JULIE: Oh, hey what?

                  GABBY: Did you see this? [leads me to her bulletin board, where some greenish-brown shard, encased in tape, is pinned to the corner.] This is my frog toe.

                  JULIE: Wait… what?

                  GABBY: So remember when we dissected frogs? And it was awesome and so interesting? -And […]


                    Fourteen Years Ago…

                    ….at about 2:00am, Dave came to bed. I don’t remember what he was doing. Then we experienced the following course of events:

                    3:30am My water broke while I was sleeping. (I clearly remember saying to Dave, “Um, buddy? Either my water just broke, or I have a serious problem.”)

                    3:35am Dave stopped trying to convince me […]


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